Showing vs. Telling in Pitches

“Show, don’t tell” is a common piece of writing advice, and it applies to pitches as well as manuscripts. A pitch that shows rather than tells can be more vivid and engaging, reflecting your grasp on the unique craft of picture book writing and capturing the interest of agents and editors.

What Does “Show, Don’t Tell” Mean?

Showing means revealing through action and behavior rather than narrative description. It creates a picture in the reader’s mind that carries emotion or meaning. Telling is describing facts and feelings without painting a picture. In your pitch, aim to show the essence of your story and your character’s journey rather than just telling what happens.

Tips for Showing in Your Pitch:

• Focus on Actions: Describe what your hero does rather than just how they feel. Show the behavior that reveals the emotional journey.
• Create Tension: Highlight the obstacles and stakes to make the pitch more dynamic.
• Focus on verbs and nouns rather than adjectives and adverbs. Can you find a stronger, juicier verbs and nouns that don’t need modifying?

Examples:

• Telling: “Billy is jealous of his baby sister.”
• Showing: “Baby Bella gets all the attention, and Billy has had enough.”

By showing rather than telling in your pitch, you can create a more vivid and engaging summary of your story. This approach can capture the interest of agents and editors and make them more eager to read your manuscript.

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